Chapter 4: Build Trust

Garry Watanabe, one of our corporate trainers, told me a story about a facilities manager in a Toronto-area municipality. It had come to light that a certain mechanic was available to fill a vacant position. The downside was that this otherwise qualified person had a bad reputation as a malcontent and troublemaker. The manager remembered sitting in on the interview when this person was hired by the city and being impressed by the individual’s desire to make a positive impact on families and communities.

Because he had an opening, and partly out of curiosity, the manager considered bringing this person over. But when he thought about what it would take to make it work, he realized it was not up to just him, so he called a meeting of his team. He told them what he was thinking of doing and why, and asked the team if they felt they would be able to create the kind of environment where people have a fair opportunity to redeem themselves. He said the decision to bring the person on would have to be unanimous, and he allowed them to decide via anonymous ballot.

With the team in agreement, the manager brought the individual on board. He realized he needed to set a tone of honesty with this person right off the bat, so in his first conversation he acknowledged the negative rumors but let him know he would have a chance to prove himself based upon his performance and his ability to get along with the other facility workers. He gave the individual his cell number and said that he believed in his ability to get the job done, but that he was also aware that occasionally “questions would arise” that he might need help with. He told the individual that if he ever found himself needing information he was not able to get easily from a co-worker or his supervisor, he was to use the number. The manager also made it clear that if he was ever in doubt as to whether to use the number or not, he was expected to call.

Within a few months, the reviews from co-workers were unanimously positive: the new employee was quiet and not easy to get to know, but he was a skilled, dedicated worker who was not afraid of hard work and was eager to help out his teammates.

This manager demonstrated the sort of building of trust that is of paramount importance at the start or restart of a relationship. He also demonstrated trust in his entire work group.

I don’t need to build a case for the necessity of trust between coach and trainee. Would you want someone you didn’t trust to be your mentor? How open would you be with this person in describing the fears and feelings that were getting in the way of your moving to the next level? How much would you even trust them to have your best interests at heart? Right . . . about as much as you’d trust Jack the Ripper with your new Cutco knives!

Clearly, you won’t succeed in igniting the Third Factor in a performer unless and until that person feels assured that you are in their corner—you’re there for them. They can be sure that their trust in you isn’t misplaced. Without trust, you won’t get to first base developmentally. Your role will be vastly diminished, from the high ground of a developer of people to, at best, a supervisor, a checker who makes sure things are being done right and corners aren’t being cut. Which means much less opportunity to build a meaningful connection with that person, and a mutual sense of purpose. Build trust and wonderful things are possible—for both of you.

There are other reasons, performance reasons, why trust is so important. Simply put, trust leads to commitment, and committed people outperform others. Olympic coaches understand that exceptional performance occurs only in a safe environment where athletes can develop self-awareness and confidence.

In his book The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, Patrick Lencioni points out that without trust, one cannot confront key issues required to turn an organization or team around. To deal with difficult and challenging issues, people need to know they are safe. They need to know that they can trust their leader and their team members.

Of course this is also true at the individual level. When someone is blocked or not moving forward, the obstacle that’s in the way often must be confronted. Confronting is much more effective when trust is present. In one of our leadership programs at Queen’s University, a manager in the pharmaceutical industry talked about conducting a touchy performance appraisal with a technically strong performer. In the formal review, she indicated to the employee that technically, her performance had been above standard in every category, and that this had also been the case the previous year. She then put away all her notes and said to the employee, “That’s my formal appraisal. Now, would you like my informal one so you can understand what’s holding you back?”

When the employee agreed, she proceeded to outline with precision the interpersonal behaviors with teammates that were holding her back from reaching the next level. A year earlier, the manager told me, this conversation could not have taken place; she didn’t yet have a relationship built on trust with this particular employee. She had spent the year developing rapport and a sense of trust with this individual and was now able to give her the feedback she needed to move forward.

When trust is present, people being asked to do something exceedingly difficult or challenging or risky, in an environment of continuous or rapid change, exhibit a much greater reach. When Olympic coaches expose their athletes to high-risk elements, the athletes must trust that the coach knows what they are capable of and will not put them in situations where they will fail.

This is equally true in the non-athletic world. When people embark on risky moves or deal with rapid change, for example, they’re often, to quote my wife, Sandra Stark, “between trapezes.” In such circumstances you need a safety net, and that safety net is trust—in the coach, manager, parents or other team members.

We sometimes naïvely think that trust is about being nice and well-liked, but you will not be trusted if you are not perceived as being competent. Your employees’ trust in you as their coach will be connected to their perception of you as a competent leader secure in your abilities. This is one of the reasons developmental coaches are lifetime learners. They never cease trying to get better, to expand their knowledge, and to fine-tune their repertoire of techniques and skills. Mel Davidson, coach of Canada’s gold-medal-winning women’s Olympic hockey team, says, “It’s important that the players perceive you striving to be better and learn at a higher level. I feel a lot of time we as coaches get caught up in the coaching world (in sport) and forget about what we can learn outside of it, whether it’s professional development or hanging out with somebody else.” Do your people see you trying to improve your own performance?

Stephen M.R. Covey, author of The SPEED of Trust, points out that when there’s a decrease in trust, there’s an increase in cost and time. He cites 9/11 and airport security as an example. This is certainly true at the office/team level as well. If people are uncertain about whether they trust their teammates or colleagues, things take a lot longer to move forward and people are less open, less disclosing and less willing to share.

What Can You Do to Develop Trust?
Before we dive into the three key ways that you develop trust, I want to make a point concerning the deliberateness with which coaches with a strong developmental bias approach the building of trust. The coaches I interviewed and those I have observed over the years don’t assume that trust will occur automatically, even for a team that has been together for a long time. Coaches are very intentional in their development of trust. They build it through precise, clear communication of a repetitive nature related to drills, skill development, performance goals, end goals, values and vision. Coaches are the first to extend trust, they understand progression, and they involve the performer.